Neil's Bar and Grill

Neil's Bar & Grille

1835 Madison AvenueMemphis, TN 38103901-278-6345

Neils is a large multipurpose bar located in the heart of Midtown that begins what i informally regard as the Madison Strip: a group of bars that begins at Neil's and ends at the P&H Cafe. Neil's attracts a wide range of clientle because it offers a wide range of activities. As a young man with a fake ID i was first dragged here by fraternity brothers to participate in Karaoke night on Wednesday for their entertainment. Thus began my well documented love affair with Karaoke.

Neils also boasts weekly performances by this man:

That's Eddie Smith on guitar. He does skillful country standards every Friday on what Neil's boasts to be the biggest deck in the city. He a attracts a crowd that knows choreography for "Paint Me a Birmingham", has memorized the secret third verse to "Friends in Low Places" and shout out requests for "Freebird" unironically. I can say first hand that he has developed a fanatical if unlikely local following.

Three mouthbreathing rednecks ignore their dates and gawk at Eddie. Pathetic.

Easily my favorite aspect of Neil's is this little beauty in the corner:

So many hours of my life, so many dollars of my pay, so many spots
on my liver...

Neil's boasts a highly competetive (and highly seedy) microcosm of shufflepuck enthusiasts with whom the experienced pucker can test his skill. Beginners will be welcomed with open arms, shown a few of the basics, offered a friendly wager and then hustled out of all of their beer money. Watch your back.

Of course Neil's does have some drawbacks. As foreshadowed above, Neil's attracts a pretty shady crowd of bikers and rednecks, in addition to obnoxious college kids who like to hog the pool table. The atmosphere and staff lack the friendliness you would like from a neighborhood watering hole, especially Neil's son who has a history of being a grade A douche on occasion.

In lieu of an accurate rating i'm rating this two drunk pictures of myself in neils, which are worth about .23 Drunk Zinnie's pictures each.